For me:
-
Monkeys and apes: they look too much like humans and expose many terrible traits of humans.
-
Greyhounds: their thin long body shape look weird to me.
Horses.
Its an easily startled 900lb retard with sledgehammers for hands.
No its not majestic, keep it the direct fuck away from me.
I was gunna ride a horse when I was real young. Was at a party or something cause there was a good amount of people there. I was next in line to ride said horse. The guy in front of me, being it was his turn, went to walk up to another horse. That horse was not a fan a bucked. Hoof straight to the side of the face. Down he goes.
Last thing I saw was him laying there motionless. Never learned anything else of it as everyone had to leave. Never tired to ride a horse from that day foward.
I’ll chill with some cows though
Cows kill more people every year than horses…
I wish I could find the original quote, but Sam Vimes, in one of Terry Pratchett’s books, says something to the effect of “being one of nature’s pedestrians. Never trust anything that looks at you with its teeth”
Horses are fucking douchebags. One ran me over back when I was 6 years old. I never forgave them.
Like the saying goes, if one horse ran you over, they all did.
I’ve always found horses to be weird animals. They have personality, but have no expression outside of losing their shit. Their posture also looks uncomfortable as fuck, always being stood up, and being on small hooves despite being huge.
I’ve always said that they’re prisoners in their own bodies.
I, too, share your hatred for horses. They are arrogant fucks who think they are better then everyone else. One exception: there’s these large horses with fluffy hooves and fat asses that seem to be chill and more like large dogs. You’re OK.
Horses are almost the worst, horae people are even worse. My girlfriend has a coworker and apparently all she does is talking about her horse and how unwell it is, and how fucking expensive the hose doctor, acupuncture, hose psychologist and keeping the horse in general is. One day she showed me a picture of her company dinner and i asked her which one the horse girl is. Of course she pointed at the 100+kg ork.
They also shove ginger in their butts to make them walk funny. Again, i don’t even like them, but they still don’t deserve to be ridden around or drove around in a trailer for hour. I would be a miserable cunt too- It’s* an easily startled
- it’s* not majestic
Fuck off.
Humans. They’re just horrible for so many reasons
Humans, because they see themselves as superior to other animals.
This method of thinking is the root of much of humanity’s problems.
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I wasn’t reinterpreting your comment, I was adding my own because I agree on humans as the animal of choice.
Like adding bullet points to a list. No critique intended.
Humans.
What a bunch of basterds
Humans, they expose the many horrible traits of humans far better than any relative specie could.
Sorry, but how can you body shape shame my beautiful lady?!
The grin!
These teefs cannot be contained.
Monkeys are total assholes. They act just like 7 year old children would if they were high on sugar and there were no repercussions for their actions.
I don’t understand why some people find monkeys cute. They’re so ugly and obnoxious! They don’t even have the presence or majesty of great apes either. The further from humans on the evolutionary scale, the cuter primates tend to be IMO. By the time you get to lemurs, bush babies, etc, you’ve hit standard mammal cuteness.
I’m convinced like 95% of people that say they like monkeys have never interacted with one.
…and the final 5% are just lying…
I hate how modern pugs look. I would love to launch them into orbit with my foot but I try to treat them like any other dog. It’s not their fault they momma made them fugly.
E: Ye, we all know it was people.
Humans made them fucked up
I feel sorry for those dogs, and other dogs that have constant physica problems because breeders and customers put looks ahead of health for many dog generations.
FYI, the reason why humans look so much like apes is because humans ARE apes (specifically, great apes).
Meh. Not that great.
Man: the okayest of apes.
man: No entry for the in the manual.
man: No entry for okayest in the manual.
man: No entry for of in the manual.
man: No entry for apes. in the manual.
Ducks and dolphins are the serial rapists of the animal kingdom.
True. From “aww” to “nope” as soon as learning the truths about dolphins.
Ducks are also assholes for stopping traffic to cross the street. Fuckers can fly, but they decide to just waddle their dumbasses across busy streets.
and beavers, those ones also rape young penguins
Also koalas.
Dogs with blue eyes look absolutely psychotic to me for some reason, like it’s indicative that they’re the serial killers of the canine world or something. It’s super unnerving. This doesn’t translate to any other animal for me; for instance I think blue-eyed cats are gorgeous.
Aww…
But then you also have these
To hell with cat eyes and wings, the new makeup trend is whatever we ended up calling this look
Slept-in smoky eye
That is one badass little buddy right there
This one still looks cute and cool to me. Yeah it is weird but in a good way.
What if they only have one blue eye?
Pandas. They are too dumb to be alive. Their diet mostly consists of plants that have hardly any nutrition, and can’t be bothered to reproduce.
This is a common belief thanks to terrible science comunication by journalists. I recommend the book The Truth About Animals: Stoned Sloths, Lovelorn Hippos, and Other Tales from the Wild Side of Wildlife by Lucy Cooke. It’s a fascinating read and has a chapter dedicated to how we’ve misunderstood and misrepresented pandas and sloths in the media.
I guess some humans are pandas
Squirrels. Cute as hell in the wild, not so much in my attic. They are tiny little destructive machines.
Their PR team is doing great work
According to the University of California’s Agriculture and Natural Resources department:
“Ground squirrels are associated with the spread of Rocky Mountain spotted fever, rat bite fever, tularemia, Chagas’ disease, adiospiromycosis, and encephalomyocarditis. Notably, they can serve as reservoirs for sylvatic (bubonic) plague, a highly infectious disease caused by the bacteria Yersinia pestis…People and their pets can get plague if they visit or live in areas where ground squirrels or other rodents are infected.”
As a fellow Jay who has also had to deal with Squirrels in the attic, I wholeheartedly concur. Squirrels - what a bunch of bastards.
Moths, especially the big ones… idk, they are just insanely terrifying to me. I know they cannot hurt me, I know they are harmless, they terrify the life out of me
The biggest one I have seen was as big as my entire hand. I thought it was a bird at first.
Luna moth?
Dolphins. Everyone wants to talk about sharks taking an annual toll on people, nobody wants to acknowledge dolphins will screw more with humans just for the lulz.
I find dolphins interesting and they look cool, but they are perverted pieces of shit.
I find their intelligence at least interesting, and am deeply fascinated with what they want to do with it, but as animals they are very low on the list.
I hate them so much I wrote a song about them and how they’ll bite the head off a fish so they can fuck the corpse. They’re messed up.
I knew they do something similar to each other (without biting each others’ heads off obviously) but don’t recall ever learning they do that with fish. Just wow. At least humans are a bit self-reflective about their activities at this point in time, dolphins are starting to sound like savages who could use a takeover.
Spiders for the simple fact that I have been “conditioned” by my mothers behaviour to fear them, cause she freaked out at the sight of even the tiniest one.
They are incredibly fascinating creatures.
Used to hate them. . Now will do anything to save one.
There’s that one guy that HATES sunfish.
This was a wild read
I love him.
Please tell me that this is your dog right after you told them that some person on the Internet said they look weird…
Pointy drippy snooooot! 🖤