Can’t catch a break

  • 0 Posts
  • 114 Comments
Joined 2 years ago
Cake day: October 12th, 2023
  • i_dont_want_to@lemmy.blahaj.zonetoAsk Lemmy@lemmy.world•*Permanently Deleted*
    20·
    1 month ago

    The less I have to worry about the essentials, the happier I am. The essentials being…

    • Personal safety

    • Access to clean water and food

    • Access to healthcare

    • Access to housing that is adequate/does not make me sick

    I still have to worry about all of the above a moderate amount, so it makes it a lot harder to deal with anything that makes me happy. If I hate my job, all of the above get a lot harder to secure, so I would need to tread carefully. My previous housing situation made me extremely sick, so I had to pay a lot more to find something that didn’t hurt me. (And therefore made it so I have to put off essential medical procedures.)

    It’s not all bad, but I would imagine removing those barriers would lead me to the freedom to make decisions that make me happier.

  • i_dont_want_to@lemmy.blahaj.zonetoAsk Lemmy@lemmy.world•Is there any hope of finding a relationship if certain body parts don't work anymore? You know the ones.
    20·
    3 months ago

    I am dating a trans woman. Her parts similarly don’t function (but it’s due to the HRT).

    I can’t speak on what might help it come back, but I can tell you there is plenty of sex you can do without an erection.

    I am assuming you’re straight. (Man only interested in women.) It might be more challenging to find a straight woman that would be open to working with this, but it’s not impossible to find a woman that would love it. The best thing you can do is be confident in who you are, what you have to offer, and your worthiness as a person. (This is sexy no matter your identity.)

    If you’re also interested in men, I hear there are some men that don’t use their penis at all. I don’t know a whole lot about that, so hopefully someone else can chime in if you indeed also like men.

    I spoiler’d some more graphic descriptions of sex acts, if you’re open to ideas.

    sex stuff here

    There’s lots of stuff you can do without a penis. The stuff you’ve probably thought of, like oral or fingering. There is also something called tribbing. In your case, this is where genitals would rub together. She might straddle you, or you might get between her legs and grind up on her.

    Sex toys are pretty damn great. You can use a dildo, hold it or use one as a strap on. You don’t even need to strap it to your crotch. You could even strap it to your thigh and let her ride that. For people that need the extra mobility, there are dildos with holes in the base you can attach to a handle.

    Lastly, there are hollow dildos you can put over your own penis. It might feel affirming to you.

    But there is more than just dildos. Vibrators are great. You might know about the regular penis shaped vibrators (vibrating dildos, they can be good), stick vibrators (meh), rabbit vibrators (meh), and wand vibrators (Hitachi type, great!) There are also small vibrators that are really versatile. You can use them alone, or put them in your strap on for stimulation for yourself while you’re penetrating someone with the strap. Don’t be shy with vibrators, they’re great on penises too.

    I kind of focused on the partner, but let’s not forget about you. I’m not sure about your numbness, but depending on that situation, you might still find pleasure from oral.

    If you haven’t already, you might also explore anal. If you’re straight, it will not make you gay, promise! Always flared base. Look up resources on how to work your way up to something bigger. You have a prostate, which makes anal very pleasurable for some men.

    It can be limiting to think of sex as penis in vagina, ends when the man orgasms. It can be so much more! Explore your partner’s body. Watch their body react to your touch. Find out what drives them crazy. Help them do the same for you. End on your terms. When you both have orgasmed? When each person signals they’re done? It’s all up to you.

    Good luck!