Familiarize yourself with the OSS manual on subtle sabotage

I am legally obligated not to have an opinion

Pretty sure this one was appointed, but yeah

Dammit I would like the ninth circuit to rule the fifth circuit unconstitutional and then have a cage match in the DC circuit to figure out for the last time who the goof circuit really is

Kill the Batman

I mean when you get down to it vibes are a major cause of many (usually smaller) recessions. Doesn’t mean he has to be a dick about it tho.

what you don’t want to be secretary at an engineering firm? why else would you get an engineering degree? ▔\▁((.′◔_′◔.))▁/▔

Suckers I inherited a cane from one side and a watercolor of a dog from the other. Behold my wealth and cry into your lentils. My lentils are salty enough.

Minor suggestion. Try dying poor at your boss’s desk. You have nutrients and minerals that can be extracted for our use, don’t be a hog.

expecting the government to act sensibly and logically is a real easy path to madness

when I ran my own business I had a support deal with my main software vendor. Maybe something like that is being held against them?

excuse me but my raid is going to be a backup just to comply with rule 10.

What other purpose does man have in life?

And now, the national anthem

Damn sausage eyes I read that as “Inside The Heat Of The Magnetocaloric Heart Pump”

One of my college professors had a printout of the school ID photos with their names by it. I had just lost 100 pounds. Apparently I was completely unrecognizable, compared to the photo at my top weight.

Goats have square pupils. It’s like the banana and the human hand